My two Burmese friends contacted me separately in the last two weeks.
One had been to an STI testing center and came back positive for chlamydia. This LGBT non-profit testing center told him now you need to go to a doctor to get treated. He messaged me not knowing what to do. He was working about thirty miles away this past week. I found the address if the local health dept STI clinic and told him to go there. He was treated and he's ok now. Now we are having some deep conversation about his sex life and the need to be careful. He needs to find a real relationship and not just hookups.
Then my other friend contacted me. He is feeling lethargic and he thinks his lips are too red. Could it be an STD? No other symptoms, so could be nothing. Why don't you go to the doctor if you really are concerned, I asked. "I'm shy" he answered.
These are two really nice, hard working guys who have had a hard life. I know them well and try to help whenever I can. They are part of an Asian culture that cannot accept gays. In addition to all their other struggles, they have to deal with being gay.
Every time I talk with these guys I am so grateful for my own life. Sometimes I feel depressed, and I really have no right to be. I am very fortunate. To be born in the US. To be well educated. To be financially well off. I have no right to complain about anything. I'm glad to have met these guys.
Other guys have told me that "STD's are just the cost of doing business for gay men." Not for me. I can't accept getting STD's and if that means less sex, then so be it.