Tuesday, January 28, 2014

The Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Lion

TwoLives commented on on of my earlier post "When the end comes (so to speak), is it back to fapping again or is this a one-time experiment?"  Nice pun, haha.  Let me address this comment.  Btw, today is day 28.

One interesting site I've come across is Your Brain on Porn.  There is a lot of good information about the negative effects of porn.  Most of the guys profiled have or had serious problems --  ED, anxiety, relationship issues, interference with school and work, etc.  I don't have these issues and I definitely don't have ED.  However, one of the recurring themes I noticed in postings on reddit was "I'm more motivated to meet people and more aggressive," and  "I'm more open to who I'll meet.  4's and 5's are looking like 7's and 8's."  Intrigue with these comments is the catalyst for my experiment with no fap.

Remember the Wizard of Oz?  The scarecrow needed a brain.  The tin man needed a heart.  The lion needed courage.  I feel like I have more courage, and I'm more aggressive when I meet someone.

Porn can skew your reality.  If you're holding out to meet guys like that, or to have sex like that -- guess what?  You'll probably be waiting a long time (especially true if you're over 40).  This was not my expectation (at least consciously), but I was probably not responding to some guys -- and I should have been.   

I want to continue this to day 90 and see how it affects my motivation to meet people, and my success once I meet them.


  1. Wouldn't it be something if you met someone really awesome, and a terrific relationship developed, all because you were incredibly horny?

    1. I wouldn't describe it as "incredibly horny." More motivated to meet people? Broadened perspectives?

  2. Just ask TwoLives--I spend a great deal of time mulling over the fall out from pornography. Clearly different individuals are impacted more or less by porn exposure, but I have come to believe that it always skews perception in some way. As a woman I have seen unreasonable expectations surrounding both physical beauty and behavioral expectations. Wither it is an experiment or a lifestyle change I think only good things can come from setting aside porn. Hope you get the perspective you are looking for from this season of life.